I didn’t expect this night to include a cocktail, with plumes of hookah smoke escaping my lips…

My friend and his pal showed me around Itaewon today. To those unfamiliar, Itaewon is a part of downtown Seoul popular for its foreigner population. Lots of foreigners = lots of Americanization, foodstuffs, and shops eager to take the bek-in’s cold hard cash. And of course that means places to party.

There are countless bars, clubs, and the infamous “hooker hill” where lady boys won’t hesitate to proposition any passing male. Sure, there are regular lady hookers as well, but I was surprised at the number of man-ladies preening at passerbys.

Last night was the first time I’ve really done anything “adult” in this country. On the surface, Koreans are a modest people, and they usually don’t wear revealing clothes or act too outrageously. But here, after the sun goes down, people watching is fascinating: girls of all races in clubbing gear (yes, including Korean gals who’d normally never reveal that much skin outside of Itaewon), more gay Korean men than I’ve ever seen in my life congregated on one street where all the boys clubs are (one aptly named Always Homme), and places of establishment created purely for the purpose of “giving some”; when there’s a customer, the storefront’s door remains locked.

This is the seedy underbelly of Korea. Rumor has it that the police sometimes goes into clubs and demands to drug-test everyone in there. You cannot refuse; that will land you in jail. If you do have anything in your system, expect to be jailed anyway, fined thousands of dollars, and deported, but not before getting to know the inside of the Korean prison system intimately. (At least there’s no ass-raping in these prisons.)

We went to a place called Bricx, a cool underground lounge-type bar with a dance floor and dim seating areas. Non-abrasive techno blared from the speakers and smoke wafted from nearby patrons with hookahs. A couple of drinks and Apple-infused tobacco smoke had me feeling pretty good for the night.

This place is pretty much the only place in Korea where people don’t bat an eye at interracial couples. All night I saw Korean girls leaving with white or black guys, and usually, the girls were way hotter than the guys (just callin’ it as I sees it). To them, the foreigners are a novelty… Girls have been known to come here to try new blood, so to speak. My pal commented that to be a female in Itaewon would be like being at a never-ending smorgasboard, but is it ever hard for a female to get laid in any country? Yeah, I thought not.

The night ended on a high. Buzzed from the alcohol and a bit lightheaded from the hookah, we made our way to an American-style diner (Copycat was the name of the place) where the proprietors claimed the best burgers in town. They were right (though the heavily promoted curly fries were nowhere to be seen).

Mmm… Itaewon cheeseburger.